Like all relationships, the connection with someone who is gone needs tending. You do this every time you think of happy times you had with your loved one. Finding ways to acknowledge your love and give thanks for all you shared helps you heal.
What happens to your loved one after they die? We may all answer that questions differently, but in one way we are all alike. Though my husband is gone, the love I feel for him is not. The relationship I had with Bob is irreplaceable. It is that unique relationship that allows me to honor his memory as I pursue a life without him.
Keeping your love alive may be bittersweet. I marked my first wedding anniversary after Bob's death by putting my engagement ring away and adding my wedding band to the necklace I wear that holds my husband's wedding band. Then I put a new ring I had made to celebrate my husband's birth and our marriage on my right hand ring finger. I will always love him ~ he will always be a part of me. Taking off my rings was an acknowledgment that I have to live in the present, for the future. He would want that.
But embracing a future without your loved one is hard. Even though each day lived is another step forward in your journey, moving farther away from the last time you were with your loved one may feel like a painful loosening of ties. All the more reason why those ties must be kept strong. Relatives and friends who can bear the tears and pain that stories of the deceased may bring forth from you and them help forge a link to the lost person in your life.
Although no one can be replaced, you do yourself and your loved one justice whenever you come together to miss, honor and remember.
Until next time ~ the clouds will clear and you will find your way.
~Paula
No comments:
Post a Comment