A New Year ~ Where are you now?

The Holiday season has come and gone, which for some may be a relief. You may be glad that it's January and you have more time for yourself. However, for some, the end of the Holidays can feel like a letdown. Getting back to life's routines can be a drain. And starting another year without your loved one may be especially difficult.  In fact, the pain of your loss may get right up in your face! Though this may be disturbing, it is part of the natural progression of grief, which, as it ebbs and flows, moves us forward and backward. That's why is is so important that you get the support you need from family and friends, and express any anger and sadness you feel to someone you trust.


As I embark on another year without Bob, it is helpful to think where I am now. Although life still can be difficult, it is important for me to acknowledge just how far I've come. A crisis, with its upheaval, provides an opportunity for self-reflection, growth and change. And in the last 10 years, I've learned a lot about myself and those around me. Indeed, I have evolved as a person as I've begun to rebuild my life. I think back to the weeks and months after losing Bob, when I felt numb, barely able to acknowledge what had happened. Over time, I began to deal with things I never had imagined. Now I face life head on and make the necessary daily adjustments. Doing as one what I used to do as two, I am finding new ways to live.


I've survived all the holidays, birthdays, anniversaries and milestones without Bob. I've survived all the stupid things that people say and the silly questions they ask. Most importantly, I've learned to respect myself and what I've been through and the sheer will it takes to go on each and every day. 


While you may have a ways to go in your journey through the grieving process, it is still important to see how far you've come.  And when you think about where you are now, you deserve to feel proud of how you have evolved as you honor your grief and your loved one.


Until next time, the clouds will clear and you will find your way.
~Paula